Thoughts on life, love and faith by Plasticmind.

20 May 20071. mandi:

hmm....i am praying for you regarding this. i'm sure you are too. i pray that god makes it abundantly clear to you what it is you are supposed to do. i know this is an obvious statement that i'm sure you've heard and thought a million times, but when you are trying to do two things full time, both of them will suffer (and you're actually trying to do 3 things full time because you're a husband too...that's not to say that you're marriage is suffering...i wasn't trying to imply that at all....)

the thought i kept thinking while i was reading this, was: "jessie, god gave you the talents and desire to be a web designer; don't deny the blessing he wants to give to you; dive headlong into it; as you say yourself, there are business people/web-designers that desperately need an example of jesus' love in their midst; gods wants to use your talents and abilities not only to bless you with something you enjoy doing, but to give people in a lost, dying sphere a refreshing breath of his love; you speak truth by saying his strength is made perfect in our weakness, but he doesn't want us to ignore our abilities that he has blessed us with....he gave them to us a for a reason and if we're not using them, what does that mean? i'm not sure i know exactly...."

this may not be the case for you or your specific situation, but i know that i can tend to think that i'm the only person who can do a specific job (ie. if i don't do this, who will?) maybe god has someone else he has in mind for the pastor position...that's not to say that you can't still be involved in a major way in your local church setting....

obviously, i'm encouraging you toward the web-design, but those are just my gut reactions and i don't know the whole situation and i always feel like i have to fix problems...that's why i'm going to continue to pray for you. something our pastor said at church last night (and maybe you've heard the analogy) is that it's terribly difficult to sit in a car that is not running and turn the steering wheel. when we just sit around asking god, "what should i do next? i don't know what to do" god says "move! i will steer you!" we have to drive on the gas of faith and god will bless that....so, if you're waiting for god to give you a sign, i think you're gonna have to take a step first...or push on the gas pedal first (to stay in line with the analogy!)

praying....

21 May 20073. Marlo:

Hey Jesse...I'll pray too.
When I'm faced with big decisions I use a "strategy" I learned from a biography about Amy Carmichael and how she faced big decisions in the girls home in India:
1. What does God/the Bible say?
2. What does the Holy Spirit say in prayer?
3.What do godly leaders say/ good Christian advice?
4. What does common sense and/or circumstance say?

All 4 have to be pointing in the same direction before moving forward on any big decision. Wait until all 4 line up.

And 3 and 4 were the ones missing from my former understanding of how God leads in wisdom issues. It never seemed that common sense was allowed to be the factor. But God certainly leads in very mundane ways sometimes. And it's perfectly ok to let Him lead that way (as long as the other 3 line up.)

This doesn't make the decisions easier, but it has really helped me.

21 May 20074. Kelly:

Talk with your wife on this one - she knows you best, I bet. And no, it's not strange or wrong the things you are feeling. The love/hate thing happened to Justin and I for about the first whole year we were at Covenant...the ministry is not a calling, pastorhood is. Ministry is not a calling, web designer is. So, what is your calling? Take ministry there.
I'm not trying to simplify your problem, but sometimes things seem bigger than they are when you are face up against it all without the answers you want or think you need. Again, talk to your wife openly about this - I'm almost positive she can weed it out with you too...I'm sure you already have sought her in this...just a reminder in case you haven't. Oh, and after you've talked with her,...just take it from one pastor's wife to another...you need to listen to her and believe what she says. You are loved and not alone.

21 May 20075. Debbie K.:

Jesse;

I will also pray for you and this situation. For what it's worth, I enjoy your sermons and I definatley think you are selling yourself short as an associate pastor. Your style of preaching is direct and to the point and you explain things in a way I can easily understand and apply to my life, and I definately think application is the key. If you sit through a sermon and the pastor doesn't tell you how to apply what he is teaching to your own life what good was the sermon. You and Jessica have had such a positive impact on our church and OVC is definately blessed to have you there. I do undertsand the feeling of being overwhelmed and will definatley pray for you.

21 May 20076. Dave:

Jesse,
Firstly of course, I would say get some sleep. Because I know I've never made a good decision while deprived of sleep. Secondly, I'd agree with the strategy to follow the four points of Godly decision-making.
There is a verse in James 1 about wisdom. "Let he who requires wisdom to ask God, who doesn't hold back and gives to all men freely."

Although we grow in wisdom, it's unfortunately never bestowed on us all at once.
We grow in it every day. Just like muscle, sometimes it has to be broken down before it can grow and be built up. When we make mistakes, it breaks our wisdom down, yes, but then as we learn from them, we grow in wisdom, and try not to make the mistake the same way again.

So I'd say enjoy the blessings you have. You have skills in many areas that can be used to witness to people. Most web designers and programmers I know are athiests. I'd have to strongly encourage you to combine your webdesign with evangelism.

Shalom.

21 May 20077. jonathan:

People always need, J. No matter where you go, what you do, people will need more than you can give.

You have to ask yourself if it's aobut their need - or your own need to be needed.

Generally speaking of course. I had to deal with that myself. I was so proud of people needing... me. In the end, it wasn't me they needed, it was what I represented. The people that needed so much... got replaced with others that needed more.

Bottom line: choose your field. The Harvest is plentious, the laborers are few. To be most effective, you have to stay in one field. Anything more, and the precious few laborers will just wear out before their time....

23 May 20078. xpressionccr:

Jesse, my friend. I read your words and the resonate so clearly with me that it almost seems like you took it from my own journal and pasted it here.

The words of all the others who have typed before me contain so much wisdom.

I would especially echo Kelly's thoughts about calling. Calling is a lifestyle--state of being. Pastors are pastors everywhere they walk, not just in a position at an established local church. And they are so even without the endorsement of an established church. They are so through the anointing and reception of that gift (karismata).

And, I feel from Mandi's words her wisdom and understanding of the church being people not an organization or a place, or an institution, but a group of people you may find anywhere. You could very well serve as a pastor to a group of believers through PlasticMind. Don't let the stigma and Pavlovian nature we wade through due to 2000 years of "Christendom" blind your heart to the beauty that is the true Kingdom message of Jesus.

You know the scriptures...continue to delve there, but this above all: Romans assures us that we know that we are the children of God because of the communion that we have with His Spirit. Listen to that Spirit. It will give you the motivation that you need. It will give you the direction that you seek. I will bring about the resolve that you long for.

God has equipped you in so many ways, Jesse, and it is not selfish pride to want to invest those talents for him.

Deep down, as a child of the Most High, I think you know what you should do...so, do what you know to be right.

I love you, my brother. And my prayers are lifted up for you as you make your choice. If you want to talk, call me.